Wednesday, May 13, 2009

The Vulture At Our Door

I have always hesitated to share the negative emotions that I journal about.
This past weekend when I was at the Inspired Retreat in NC, I had my journal there, sharing some of the pages with my friends. One page in particular seemed to strike a cord with almost everyone...
It was about insecurities.
I decided to share with everyone.
To show the vulture that sits on my fence from time to time.
It may be difficult to read so I am writing it below...

"There are days that the old insecurities just claim a presence in my head...
they scream for attention...
and stand in the doorway - patting their foot...
impatient with my ignoring them...
sometimes I give them the floor and watch them nip and bite at my heels.
They exhaust and fuel me at the same time.
Experience says to ignore them -
emotion demands that I hold and caress each one -
show my undying love and devotion to each and every issue -
my emotions are not reliable when it comes to my insecurities and doubts.
I must walk away...
I must Fly..."

So, go...
fly...

3 comments:

lori vliegen said...

you've expressed yourself beautifully through your words, and i also love the way you expressed it artistically in your journal! thanks so much for sharing this, carol. i can't tell you how often i allow my insecurities to get the best of me...i'm still trying to learn how to fly.

Martha Lever said...

I love al ofl your journal pages--and this one is SO great and So true. It strikes a cord with me too. I have a vulture that taunts me also and sometimes he is allowed to come in a nip at my heels also and often he draws blood! But usually I am able to fight him off and fly on--sometimes I wonder if one day he will finally defeat me---but that's wrong thinking. Don't go there, Martha! Hope to see you sometimes this summer.

Tess said...

I flew over from MArtha's blog and wow, she is right. Your juournal pages are awesome. This one stands true for me too. One day I will learn to fly, I will! Thanks for sharing this...